On the twelth game of the season Coach Peyton gave to me 12 Romped Redskins, 11 Punked Patriots, 10 Battered Bucs, 9 Ragged Rams, 8 Pounced Panthers, 7 Dirty Birds, 6 Dunked Dolphins, 5 Shrunk-en Giants, 4 Wrecked Jets, 3 Beat up Bills, 2 Tame Eagles, and a Lion Sauce Picante!

That time again!

It is that time of year once again. The house is filled with the sounds of power tools whirring and the sewing machine humming. Smells fill the house as the hot glue gun heats up, "stuff" bubbles on the stove, and the paint cans spray. Ok so to be perfectly 100 percent honest, some of the activity is on the patio, but the smells and sounds still make their way into the kitchen!

About 2 years ago, our oldest daughter sent out emails requesting our family go to a Buy Nothing Christmas. She was thinking about what she wanted to instill into our granddaughter about Christmas and what it is really all about. In theory, I applauded her sentiments. In reality, I groaned because I feel my creativity is just not up to snuff with the rest of the family's. Since that time though, it has been my great joy to participate.

So here we are at it again!

May this season be one of thanks, reflection, praise, and joy for you and your family!

Welcome Skyler!

Skyler Wilson Assevedo was born a little after 6 pm on 07/08/09. Mom had a few complications and had to stay in the hospital a long 6 days, but both are doing fine now. I am still running on limited sleep from taking care of mama and baby, but my new grandson is indeed a joy! Vivian and Andrea came in for a few days and were a great help!

His Marvelous Grace

I cannot stop meditating upon His grace. I cannot express in words how humbling this situation with my youngest daughter has been.

You see, I realize I have been a spoiled brat in my relationship with God. I thanked Him for His blessings and praised Him in the trials. But in my heart of hearts, which the Lord knows and searches,there was always this feeling that I somehow deserved the blessings for being His faithful child. There was always this bit of "why me?" in the trials and losses. The enemy always waiting to whisper in my ear how God had let these things happen to me when I had done everything He had ever asked of me.

I confess I have always been a goody two shoes. Never smoked. Drank very little. Never did drugs. Always went to church, prayed, read my Bible. From a child, I loved God and church. I was supposed to have been born dead, but God spared me, and though my father did not live right at the time, he asked God to spare me and he would give me to Him. That story has always had a profound impact on my entire life.

I cannot tell you now how much I see that my righteousness is indeed as filthy rags. That there are no big sins and no little sins. There is just sin. And the marvelous grace of God.

If I got what I deserved, I would have nothing. Grace: UNMERITED/UNDESERVED favor!

I truly know deep inside now that I deserved death and punishment. His grace gives me life and blessings. Praise Him for his marvelous grace!

Heart Overflowing with Praise

My heart is overflowing with praise today toward our Heavenly Father. I have been in an attitude of praise and worship all day.

My youngest daughter is unmarried and expecting a baby boy July 1st. Her fiance put her through a lot before calling off the engagement. First off, let me say that I recognize the sin in what she did. However, I also forgive her freely and refuse to make an innocent baby suffer any more than he will have to because of this situation. I also recognize that her sin is no blacker or more evil than the ones I find myself having to repent of every day.

Our Father has been reminding me today of this is how He loves us. I sin daily and make so many mistakes, yet He never stops loving me and He never stops blessing me. I am in awe of the profound depth of His love. Once again I rejoice that I do not have to be perfect for Him to love me. There is nothing I can do to make Him love me any more than He does right now. There is nothing I can do to make Him love me any less than He does right now. His love is constant, perfect, and unconditional. I pray for a heart to love others as He does and for His eyes of compassion and mercy.

Grace is unmerited favor. With this baby, I am learning a lesson in grace in such a powerful way. My daughter has been looking at baby items and furniture that she would love to have for Skyler. She never asks us to buy it for her, but she just shares what she thinks is adorable with me in mother/daughter way of sharing. I look at the prices and just commit it to the Father. Every item she has selected in the exact pattern she has admired has been provided to us through the grace of God!

For example, on a particular Monday she admired a $200 stroller system in Toys R Us. On Wednesday, I was out picking up my medicine, when I felt a whisper to go by the Thrift Store. I obeyed, and there was the exact stroller she had admired in excellent condition for $19.95 When I took it to the register, they informed me it was Sr. Citizen's Day and 55+ get everything in the store for half price! What a blessing!!

The blessings have not stopped there either! The convertible bassinet she admired that was $100 was provided for $30. The lady had only used it to take photos with her real baby baby dolls. That $1000 round crib with a canopy and mattress was provided for $350, and when UPS broke it in transit, they paid the damages for the replacement part, which is now on the way! The $159 high chair that went on sale at Target for $99 plus shipping? No problem for our great God! Here it is for $60, brand new because it is a floor sample! The $99 walker? Here you go for $40!

I was a bit reticent about posting this as I did not want people to think I was glorifying sin. I am not! I am glorifying our Great and Loving and Merciful God! He has provided more abundantly than I could even ask or think in this time of need. Was it deserved? Nope. But that is why it is called Grace!

Little over 1/3 of me is gone!

Although it is not as fast as I would like, and I have to keep reminding myself that it took a long time to put this weight on so it will take a while of living a healthy lifestyle change to take it off, I have lost 64 of the 174 pounds I want to lose. I still look and am obese, which is why it is hard to notice the loss.

I have to celebrate the victories as I find them, though. My dresses drag the ground now there is not as much width of me me spreading them out. My seat belt fits with ease and comfort now in my car, and is no longer a fight to get it buckled. I also was able to go down to a Large instead of an Extra Large in a product I use for health reasons!

I am so glad I do not have to be perfect!

Boy! Am I ever! Because then I would have a long, long, long, long....you get the idea...way to go!!

Over Easter, while visiting with Steven, Andrea, and Vivian, I had brought a kit to make an Easter bunny house out of cookies, candies, and icing. I forgot my icing bag and tips, so when Vivi and I went to make it, my lines came out crooked and thick in some places. My darling granddaughter patted my arm and said,"It's ok, Nanny! We do not have to be perfect! Jesus loves us just like we are! This is OUR bunny house! We can make it how we want. Just do our best! It does not have to look just like the picture on the box!"

Then she happily proceeded to decorate the house the way she wanted. Every time I would make an oops, she would laugh and say it was ok! It was our house and we did not have to be all "perfecty perfecty!"

Such wisdom from a 4 year old. I am so glad her mother does not require perfection from her but just requires her best effort. And she judges her best effort by 4 year old standards not adult ones.

We have extended our "buy nothing Christmas" to include birthdays and other occasions. For Andrea's birthday, I decided to give her the gift of a shiny sink. Of course, Vivi had to help! She was so cute with an old toothbrush scrubbing around the edges and scrubbing the faucet. What a joy this little one is as she grows up knowing she does not have to be perfect, that Jesus loves her just as she is, that all she has to do is her best, and it is not money or stuff that brings happiness but time and love!

Happy Birthday to an American Hero!

Happy 28th Birthday, James Douglas Wilson! Each year on his birthday I light a candle, say a prayer, and wish him lots of love and happiness.

Against tremendous odds, this young man made it to adulthood, joined the Army, served this country in the first tours in Afghanistan, and on 2 tours of Iraq, being injured in Afghanistan and in the last tour of Iraq. He now has a Traumatic Brain Injury from that last injury and fights daily not just to survive but to get the treatment he needs from the government.

I love my country. I just wish we treated our veterans better. A friend of mine who served during Vietnam was so bitter when I told him about my son's enlistment. He said the government would just use him up and throw him away when they were done. Still naive, I believed he was wrong and just old and bitter. Now I have seen it happen not only to my son but to other veterans, I am saddened to my core.

Happy Birthday, son! I love you with all my heart!

The Day the World Changed Forever

Thirty years ago I became a mother for the first time. I was to make this journey another 5 times; each one special and wonderful except for the one time where my little girl went to heaven instead of into my arms.

Andrea Lynn Wilson was her name and she made her appearance at 6 pounds 14.5 ounces and 19 inches long at Phoebe Putney Memorial Hospital in Albany, Georgia, on a Tuesday, March 27, 1979 at about 1 pm. She was 3 weeks early. She was born with a head full of her signature blonde hair and had the fairest skin. So fair that it was translucent and you could see her veins.

From the day she entered this world, she always had her own unique way of doing things. She rolled over early, pushed herself to standing in your lap, or would wiggle her head between your legs to view her world upside down like a bat.

And my world changed forever on that day. I had joined the ranks of the elite society of mothers! Still not sure I belonged in that society, I struggled along and did the best I could, making many mistakes along the way.

Still and all her birth one of the 8 best things that ever happened in my life! Now she is 30 years old, she is still my pride and joy and one of the 7 loves of my life!

Tooth Extraction Owie!

I find it remarkable that I have had 6 children all through natural childbirth, yet dental work can still turn me into a baby! I had a molar pulled last Monday and it knocked me flat on my keister for a week! It seems out of my several illnesses and diseases, about 3 or 4 make me more prone to tooth abscesses. This time they had to pull the tooth that was abscessed. It has already had a root canal, but there was just no saving the tooth this time.

By the way, Vivian, your mommy's memory is flukey! We did make her brush her teeth! Every night, Poppy would say, "Brush your teeth, and go to bed!" She also had a chart and would get stickers when she brushed her teeth!

Women's Conference in Tioga in April

I was wondering if any of my blogging buddies will be at Women's Conference in Tioga next month? A couple of the ladies from our church and I are coming up for it and staying with Andrea. We are looking forward to it. For many years when our kids were growing up, we made several trips up that way for Women's Conference. Now we all 3 have adult children and 2 of us are grandmothers.

We are all 3 first generation Pentecostals. In fact, much of our church in Marrero was first generation during our childraising years. Now that generation of first generations have raised up our own 3rd and 4th generations. Vivian Abigail Warren is my little 3rd generation Pentecostal, and Regan Michal is Lauren's. In both our cases, our daughters moved away from home. Kathy's daughter married and moved away from home as well.

In fact at Emily Baudean's wedding, pastor Mike Sartin said he was getting a bit tired of sending his girls off to do "missionary work." He said it was about time some of our boys went off and fetched home some brides.

Oh well! Hope to see some of you next month!

Skylar's Heart is fine

Skylar Ryan Wilson.

His heart is fine the pediatric cardiologist assured us yesterday afternoon.

It's a Boy!

My youngest child is now carrying my first grandson. He is about 23 weeks along and weighs about a pound and 4 ounces the doctors told us today. After spending all day at Ochsner, they informed us they wanted to send her across the street to see the pediatric cardiologist. Evidently, they could not get a good enough picture to say with 100% certainty that there is not a hole in his heart. The doctor explained she saw some blood flow between the left and right chambers, which could indicate a hole or it could mean he was squirming around so much it made the image appear to have blood flow.

She was very reassuring that it was probably nothing, however since she could not say with 100% certainty there was nothing, she wanted the specialist to take a look. Please be in prayers for this wee one.

Update on Ann

She came through the long surgeries just fine. We will know in a week or so if they got all the cancer, but they are hopeful.

And she has 9 grandchildren.

Her daughters plan to take her out of state to a quiet place to recuperate.

Thank you for all the prayers and thoughts for this family.

My Sister In Law's valiant struggle

My Sister-in-law Ann will be 52 on Feb 28, and I on March 24. On Monday, she is scheduled to have a double mastectomy for her breast cancer. I know this must be very frightening for her as her mother had a mastectomy about the same age, and died at 58 years of age.

Ann and I went to the same elementary school in the 4th grade. We were friends, and I always treasure her sweet ways and kind heart.

My husband has gone to SC to be with his sister at this time as both of their parents have passed on now, and their stepmother is in the end stages of brain cancer. Please keep them all in your prayers. Ann is the mother of 4 children and a grandmother of 3.

Legend of the Refrigerator

Well, today is Friday, and my fridge is gleaming except for the very bottom of it. I bent down to scrub it and only got one swish in as my knees, hips and back popped loudly and excrutiating pain shot through me. Cleaner is still soaking in there so maybe my husband will scrub that one part out when he comes home.

It took a week, but I am proud of it!

The Power of 15 Minutes

One thing the Fly Lady system is big on is teaching you the power of 15 minutes. You set a timer for 15 minutes and accomplish what you can in that time on a focused goal. This is really a great concept for me, and one I heard before on my invisible disabilities support list. After 15 minutes or so, my knees or hands or back or something usually give out on me.

The other thing she tries to teach you is the power of baby steps. To break every thing down into baby steps and take one step at a time. This is a hard one for the Perfectionist brat who I am convinced lives inside every woman. We want to start something and finish it all in one fell swoop! Consequently, Perfectionist's sister Procrastinator rears her head and tells us if we cannot finish a task today, then why start it? So we put it off, becoming more and more anxious/depressed and fretful as the undone task keeps growing before our eyes.

When you have little ones, sometimes all you can grab are 15 minutes at any one time!

Today I set my timer for 15 minutes, donned my lovely new gloves that Andrea and Vivian sent me for my birthday and tackled the top shelf and top door compartment of my refrigerator. I have been doing a good job of keeping the outside shiny, but as soon as I opened it, I would be depressed at the sight that greeted me. The thought of cleaning the whole thing at once was enough to tire me out just thinking about it.

I resolved today to do what I could in 15 minutes, and then make myself stop. Consequently, now I smile when I open the refrigerator because I also had time to wipe down the entire outer rim of the inside compartment in addition to cleaning the top shelf, top *ceiling*, and top door compartment. I know another 15 minutes from now very soon I will have 2 more clean shleves and in another 15 minutes, a clean drawer, and in still another 15 a second clean drawer, while also cleaning the shelves in the door one at a time each 15 minutes. So with 45 more minutes of work broken down into 15 minute segments, I will soon have my gleaming refrigerator.

My gloves the girls sent me are so adorable with little pink bows and a ruffled trim! They are almost too pretty to use, but Andrea has been teaching me the power of blessing myself and using my pretty things, not saving them for a day that may never come. How many ladies have you heard of, perhaps your own mothers or grandmothers, who died with entire sets of handkerchiefs, nightgowns, sheets, towels, dishes, decorative soaps, what have you, all stored away brand new and never touched, waiting for that elusive day to be used and enjoyed?

That is a concept my generation got from our mothers and grandmothers because they survived the World Wars and the Great Depression. When decluttering my kitchen, it was hard to throw out the butter bowls and whipped topping bowls. Of course, the greener me should have saved those and stopped buying nice plastic containers with lids. So maybe Granny has something to teach us younger folks after all. :-) I am old enough to remember the junk drawer at home filled to the max with rubber bands from newspapers and bread twist ties.

Of course, now we have zippy bags and it is hard to find bread with twist ties. Now they put those little plastic tabbies on it, which I despise as no one ever puts them back on around here. They either tie a knot in the bag, making it more complicated to open later without ripping it, or they just leave the bag open for the bread to go stale.

Anyway, love yourself today and use something special you may be saving for that elusive someday. Tackle a big job in 15 minutes, only doing as much as you can during that 15 minutes. Then treat yourself to a cup of a special tea or coffee blend in your prettiest mug or cup. go on! You deserve it!

Happy Valentine's Day!

I guess it is the elementary school teacher in me, but I adore holidays...all of them! When we homeschooled, each child got an age-appropriate monthly booklet of activities. February, for the shortest month, was so jam packed...Groundhog Day, usually Mardi Gras and Ash Wednesday, Valentine's Day, President's Day, Black History month, Dental Hygiene Month, Heart Awareness Month, and some others I am sure I am forgetting. I had rented a copy machine that stood in the kitchen. I ran off those booklets and put them together with such joy, using teacher resources I had collected over the years.

One wall held a giant bulletin board from when the church school downsized and had leftovers. I still remember the year Andrea made that bulletin board an undersea world. She made it an aquarium, complete with a taped tour describing the many "creatures" we saw.

I made sure Daddy remembered to stop and get Valentine candy for each of his valentines and bring it home. We made pretty cards for Daddy. We still send the kids Valentine candy. Steven and Andrea were married Feb 1, and their first "fight" was over her Daddy Valentine's Candy. Seems she put it in the refrigerator, and he viewed it as community property, while she was emphatic that it said "TO ANDREA from Daddy."

This year I made sure to send Tiffany a king cake in Alaska. She loves those things for some reason.

To all my Valentines, both near and far, have a good one! And Vivian, I love you more than GREASY GOPHER GRAVY with a side of Grits!!!

Sibling Rivalry

Over the breakfast table this morning, I shared with my husband the email round robin between Andrea, Tiffany, and me about those Heart Family dolls. I was keeping it quiet that I found 2 sets, but as you can see in the comment section below, Miss Tiffany started claiming the family as hers. She sent me 3 or 4 emails about how she was sure they were hers not Andrea's. So, I started collecting clues to figure out which was whose.

Andrea remembered her family all 4 came in one big box and that she stored them in the box. That solves that. They are still in their original box. Tiffany remembered hers had a hole in her hand because she lost her diamond ring. Check! The bath time set has the mom with a hole in her hand! But Tiffany remembers the clothes on Andrea's so vividly and says that must be hers! This has me thinking she probably "borrowed" those clothes, which knowing how protective Andrea had to be of her things with 4 younger siblings, probably was one of the "fights" that led to their dividing the room in half when they were younger!! Of course my ever enterprising oldest child could have sold her sister those clothes since she did make money selling stuff she no longer wanted in "garage sales" to her siblings! Hrmmm!!!!

Well, Big Mama has decided, ladies! Andrea gets the set in church clothes for Vivi. Tiff gets the bath time dolls with all the extra babies. I am not sure if I will give Tiff the nursery set and Andrea the school set or split both sets between you!

Your dad was laughing over the whole email discussion punctuated with the "That's mine!"s. He says who knows what else belonging to the 2 of you he has hidden in the attic! Hehe for your next "Buy Nothing Christmas" you may get a picture of some childhood treasure long forgotten with clues to find it!!!

The Joys of Raising a Strong Willed Child

What a marvelous invention the internet is! We can use it to research just about anything; I think google has made it into the dictionary! We can shop online, order our pizzas, medicine, groceries, snapshots, you name it. We can use the telephone through it, instant message friends a world away, renew old friendships, make new friendships, and even video teleconference. There is music, movies, games, virtual cards and flowers, and so much more. Today I shall use it to do something Moms have been doing since the days of Eve: embarrass my oldest child!!

I was thinking of Andrea's struggles the other day as she was growing up with chemical sensitivities. Back then I caught Dr. Lendon Smith on the Donahue Show as he talked about children with a "low stress threshold," and looked at the baby in my arms and knew my first child was such a child. I found the book _Improving Your Child's Behavior Chemistry_ and read every word, adapting things in the household to promote a place of peace for my little one.

Dr. Smith listed some things they found to be common in children with a "low stress threshold," such as (only listing the ones applicable to our situation here):

~Born after a high risk pregnancy (I had severe toxemia)
~Premature birth or birth before 38 weeks (They ruptured my membranes at 37 weeks because I was already in labor and to hasten her birth before complications of pre-eclampsia escalated)
~Cord around neck at birth (It was wrapped so tightly they had to unwrap it after delivery of her head to deliver her shoulders)
~Extremely fair skin, blue eyes,blonde hair: Andrea was born with a "cotton top" of blonde hair (evidently this is unusual and the nurses would ask where I hid the peroxide as most blonde children are born with darker hair that falls out and grows back in blonde. She is still a natural blonde at 30 years old. Her skin was translucent at birth, and she is still very fair. She has our blue eyes.)

According to Dr. Smith, these things are insults to an infant's nervous system, so they are born ill-equipped to deal with the stimuli around them. Most parents in that day had a brightly colored nursery with lots of auditory and visual stimuli, which I did, and these things are painful for such children. It was bizarre in that we could get her to sleep but putting her in her room in her crib, she would immediately begin screaming. We quickly learned the only way she (and us) would get any rest was to allow her to sleep snuggled in her dad's armpit. During the day she would sleep in her carrier because it had sides that were closed in.

At one week of age, you could put her in the center of a bed with head and feet pointed at the floor and somewhow she would find her way to the floor. At 2 weeks she could roll over and over back to front and front to back. And cry? She constantly cried! When she was tiny, a visit to SC to relatives was punctuated with one very unhappy baby. My mother deduced that she was in pain from being held by so many different people and so much "excitement" around her. She took her in a quiet, dark room and rocked her 'til she quieted and finally slept. Visits to the mall or stores, even church, resulted in one screaming infant or toddler. She liked to be held but not tightly and not swaddled. She wanted to know there were close boundaries around her (like the carrier with the sides) and she wanted to smell Mom or Dad, but not be kissed or rubbed.

Andrea was the kid who went to church with the Tupperware cup of apple juice for snack time since she could not have the red koolaid so prevalent in the 80s Sunday School classes. She had homemade whole wheat honey cookies for her snack.

Out of all this, emerged a child with an astonishing strong will. Thinking about it the other day, I realized this is how she coped with the tricks her body was playing on her. She set her mind to survive her environment, to weather the storms inside her body, and to make it.

And she did!

Today, the beautiful, accomplished, talented, graceful, kind young lady is a woman of dignity and integrity and high principles. She sets her mind to something and look out! It will soon be done!

So in thinking more, I can testify if you are blessed with a strong willed child, you have the opportunity to raise this kind of adult. Your little strong willed person with your guidance can grow up to be a mighty arrow in the hand of a mighty God. These children can become the adults who will not waver or wishy washy in their loyalty and commitment to God, to home, to family, to community, to friends.

Further thinking, I decided that God had honored my prayers over the years to send my children enough suffering and trials to make them into pure gold. So my gleaming, golden haired child with the heart of gold, I love you as we approach your 30th birthday.

(Here you have proof I am your mom! I embarrassed you on the internet!!!!)

My Sister's Keeper Finished

I finally finished this book, and I will not spoil it for those who wish to read it or to see the upcoming move from it. I was pleasantly surprised with the story. It did make me glad I know God in my life on a personal level. I cannot imagine having to face life's situations without Him!

There were a lot of issues raised in the book and most were left open for the reader to form his/her opinion. I was struck by the story of the eldest brother's acting out behaviors I think most of all. I know what it is like in a family to have one child with emergent medical needs and some of the sibling issues that come out of that.

I am still not sure how I feel about having a "designer baby" to save a sibling's life. I have no idea what I would do in that situation and am glad it never arose in my life. I do believe if any of my children could have donated blood or marrow or an organ to have helped my older son, they would have done so.

/sadface

My sign language class has been cancelled "until further notice." It seems only 2 of us signed up for it. I hope they send my money back. Maybe, I will look into the class at the local community college. I was so looking forward to this class, too!!

The Heart Family

Back in the 80s Mattel made some 11.5 inch dolls known as the Heart Family.

http://www.kattisdolls.net/faces/heartf.htm

The link will have to do until I get a digi camera.

These dolls had a mommy, daddy, baby boy and girl. There were neighbor children and grandma and grandpa. I really did not want to encourage my girls to play with Barbies, but when this family came out, I thought it was too precious and perfect for my little Andrea. Mommy had long hair and wore those 80s style "Pentecostal Patty" dresses with the high collars and long sleeves. There was also the Heart Family Schoolhouse, which we gave Andrea since we homeschooled, and the Heart Family Nursery.

In our cleaning and downsizing and decluttering, we discovered a box in the attic with Andrea's Heart Family of 4 dolls...Mom, Dad, toddler girl, baby boy, and most of the accessories she had, including the school house. I emailed her to make sure it was hers since we had 3 daughters, and I was concerned maybe Tiffany had a set and it was hers. That maybe Andrea had given hers away, and I had forgotten. She was so excited to inform me that they were hers!

With our "Buy Nothing Family Christmas," this will be my gift to Miss Vivi. I think she will love having her Mommy's dolls to play with. I am looking to sew some more outfits for them, and Uncle Jon Jon is strongly considering building them a house of their own, leaving it for Vivi and Andrea to choose the decor and paint colors.

Inspired by Ashley (Mommy) Fowler

I was inspired by Ashley's blog on her husband to do one myself the day after my 31st anniversary.

Here are the things I love about my husband:

1) He loves God and serves Him willingly.

2) He always took me and my babies to church.

3) When I was in the hospital with difficult pregnancies, he was taking care of the other babies.

4) I never had to worry if he would go to work on any given day. He always worked hard to provide for us.

5) He supported my efforts to be a stay at home mom and to home school our children.

6) I have never ever had to clean vomit up after any one. He always did it.

7) He took time and effort to take us on vacations that were geared to the kids.

8) When Andrea and Douglas were 3 and 1, Douglas still nursed at night, and I helped out at the church school. We had a conference in Baton Rouge on a Friday and Saturday. My dear husband drove up to Baton Rouge after work and brought the babies so I could nurse my little fellow.

9) He is handsome and always dresses nice. He is also never loud or brash with other people. Manners and class are important to him in that he walk as a child of God with dignity.

10) Many families break up when a child has special health needs. Ours weathered the storms. On our wedding day, our pastor when praying the blessing on us, had a spirit of prophecy come on him. He said strong winds would blow against our marriage and when others would divorce, we would not divorce. That the trials would drive us not further apart but closer together and closer to God. Andrea as a child had a low stress threshold and did not tolerate certain chemicals in the air or her food or clothes well. Noises and colors were painful to her. She cried a lot and hated having clothes next to her skin as it hurt her. Daddy walked the floor after work and school with her singing, "Daddy's girl! daddy's girl! Daddy's little baby girl!" Douglas was diagnosed with childhood onset schizophrenia at 13, but when he was 15, we discovered he had XXY/XY mosaicism (Klinefelter Syndrome) and an atypical mental disorder. There were nights we could not sleep for watching over him, trips an hour away to the hospital to pick him up for Christmas or weekend leave, and the time dad had to have stitches in his head when he slipped and fell into the dresser while trying to stop Doug from hurting himself. Tiffany was born after I spent 6 weeks in the hospital in premature labor away from my family. She had a heart problem and then at 16 months developed a seizure disorder. God miraculously healed her of both when she was 3 and one day when Daddy got her out of the nursery at church and took her to the front for prayer. Pastor Michael Sartin said as they walked down the aisle that God had told him he was going to heal the Wilson baby, and He did! Jonathan had recurring ear infections and had to have tubes put in his ears at 2. Melanie has ADHD. Daddy was a strong and comforting force in all their lives through all the trials.

Now I am old and gray and sick, he is still here. I confess that I find myself looking forward to the empty nest stage of our life together.

31 years ago today

About this time, 31 years ago today, I stood in front of God, my pastor, my friends, and family and made a vow "til death do us part."

Hard to believe it has been so long. Though there are times I think about what if I had made different choices in my life, like remained single, travelled, gotten my PhD, bought a house in Due West, SC, and taught English at Erskine College, where I got my AB in Elementary and Special Education, I do not think I would change my choices if I could. I cannot imagine a world without my 5 delightful children in it, not to mention one with out my precious Sugar Bean (Vivian).

There are some mistakes I regret making, but in the words of Aaron Neville, "It took who I was, and where I've been to make me what I am." Now, there are those who would say that what I am is no prize, and I would probably agree with you. There is so much I wanted to do with my life that is still undone.

So long as my heavenly Father will one day say, "This is my child in whom I am well pleased. Enter ye into the rest and joys of the Lord" then I shall feel I ran the race and finished at His feet.

Class Postponed a week

My first sign language class was scheduled for last night. Evidently, the instructor had to go out of town, so it will not start until next week and add a week on to the end.

I was a bit disappointed as I have been looking forward to taking this class. Oh well, there is always next week!

Mom In Chief

Major Kudos to First Lady Michelle Obama! Here is a woman with a Harvard Law degree who has publicly stated she plans to be Mom in Chief, first of all. Settling her girls and caring for them is her main objective.

Feminists have criticized her as living beneath her possibilities. I think she is living up to them. It takes a lot of dignity, courage, and intelligence to be a mom in this day and age. To make the choice to put your family first may cost something in the short term, but pays great dividends in the long term.

There are those who say it will be easy for her with all the"hired help," but they must have missed the memo where she has stated her girls will continue to clean their rooms and make their own beds. I think Mrs. Obama knows not everyone has the means and opportunity to juggle a professional and home life as well as she has. She has said as difficult as it was for her at times, she thinks how much harder it must be for some others without family, money, support available.

As her husband said, "I believe in the general theory that if Mom is happy, everybody's happy." I hope that translates into good national policy, which will improve the lives of countless Americans.

In a time when America needs strong family role models, Michelle Obama has a chance to lead the way to a stronger nation through stronger families. I wish her well.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/heather-cabot/what-the-mom-in-chief-mea_b_158220.html

Forty Pounds lost and still FLYing

Yay! I am now down 40 pounds thanks to Nutrisystem. Eating better, my liver is less swollen and painful and my IBS has really cleared up a lot. I can put my own socks and shoes on now without difficulty or pain. I am also braving my first sign language class tomorrow without fear of pain or accidents.

Melanie did my nails over the weekend and they look very nice. She gave me tips(first time ever for me!) She wants to go to Beauty School, but is taking a year off to earn money and get out on her own so she can qualify for a grant. Saturday past she had an interview at the H2) salon and spa in Metairie ( http://www.h2osalon-spa.com/location.html ). They are looking for a receptionist and think it would be a great place for her to get her start. They said they would call her this week to come in for a second interview to spend 30 minutes at each of their 4 "stations" so she and they can get a feel for which would be best for her. A Beauty salon with valet parking, dahlin'!!

On the Home front, we are still Flying! I love the Fly lady system! One baby step at a time, things are changing!!

Sit down and have a cuppa with me

Bragging on the Cave People

I am so proud of them!

The other night, Melanie made herself a late dinner. I dreaded walking into the kitchen because I just knew I would find dirty pans with food caked on them on the dirty stove, dirty dishes in the sink, and the dirty George Foreman grill on the dirty countertops. Imagine my delight to discover clean countertops, stove, grill, and sink with clean pots and pans and dishes in the dishwasher ready to be put away!!!! She had even made a gallon of fresh tea and refrigerated it!!

Saturday, after the groceries were in the house, they were all put away into their designated places. The pantry, fridge, and freezer all stayed organized!! I plopped a nice chuck roast into the crock pot with a cup of unsweetened tea and some seasonings for Sunday dinner.

Sunday, after church, the roast was taken from the crock pot;Jonathan made veggies and a macaroni and cheese; Melanie set the table and folded pretty paper napkins in a pretty design around the silverware; I heated my NS chicken breast; and we enjoyed a nice family dinner. Afterward, the trash was carried out, the leftovers stored properly,the dishwasher was humming along cleaning the dishes, the floor and counters all cleaned!

Andrea will understand this one. LoL. When I used to travel a lot for advocacy work, I would come home to the counter with the coffee pot caked in old cofffee spills with spilled creamer and sugar from every day I had been gone. Training the head cave man to use a paper towel and to clean up his morning coffee messes as he makes them has been a stuggle of 30 some years.

I started after I clean the kitchen each night after dinner, to put a fresh paper towel down in front of the coffee maker with a clean spoon and cup, thus taking away his common argument he was in a hurry and did not have the time to clean up his messes before leaving for work. Now, mind you, the paper towel is now dirty and waiting to be thrown away each morning, but it is a lot easier to do that than have to clean up a major mess. I also repurposed an old microwave glass carousel dish to hold the creamers, sugar, splenda, honey, etc. and added some candles for interest. No more morning coffee messes!

Lastly, one of the things about putting dishes away that was tough for me was sorting the silverware. This is because my arthritis makes bending and standing and grasping painful. Standing there sorting silverware was just a painful way to end putting away clean dishes. My dear head cave man unwittingly hit on a solution!! Now that he has to rinse and load his own dishes after use, he said we should put the silverware in the basket in the dishwasher all organized. LIGHTBULB!!! BRILLIANT!!!

I was ready to toss the divider in the silverware drawer so I could just dump the basket in there without sorting! Now everyone puts the forks together, the spoons together, the knives together, the utensils together. What a breeze it is to take the basket out of the dishwasher to the silverware drawer and merely grab 3 or four handfuls of silverware and place in the correct divider.

And, Andrea, remember my utensil drawer by the stover? How it looked like the Tupperware cabinet? No more! I put an extra silverware divider in there and organized that drawer. With the new dishwashing system, every thing quickly gets put away in the proper place.

On yea, by the way, remember that "space age" plastic cereal spoon one of you got out of a cereal box? It is gone now. In my decluttering, I came across it in the utensil drawer along with one of Vivi's baby spoons. I saved the baby spoon, but tossed that cereal spoon. It was kind of hard with that voice yelling "MEMORIES," but I told that voice throwing that junky spoon away was not the same as throwing away the memories...I still have those! :-)

With Flylady, one of the principles is to get dressed each morning, including lace up shoes, and fix your face and hair. Because of health issues, this is not always practical or comfortable for me. I do not even own any lace up shoes. However, instead of excusing myself with why I could not do it, I thought to find a way to do it that suits my situation. Andrea's mother in law gave me a box of "mumus" or "patio dresses" or whatever you want to call them, which were her late mother's. These are comfortable, modest, and attractive. I now get up and put a fresh one on after my shower. I do not sleep in them;they are my house "dresses." Melanie bought me some new house shoes for Christmas, and I make sure I put those on each day.

So it is possible to civilize cave people. really, it is!!!!!!!!!!!

My Meditation for Today

Today, I rediscovered the following quotation by Helen Keller. I made it my thought to meditate on and "chew" on for today.

I have four things to learn in life: To think clearly without hurry or confusion; To love everybody sincerely; To act in everything with the highest motives; To trust God unhesitatingly. --Helen Keller

I did it!

I have signed up to take a beginner Sign Language class at the parks and recreation department on Tuesdays, starting Jan. 20. The class will be one hour for 8 Tuesdays. Brave new world to get out there again, but I am determined to do it.

Oh I forgot to mention!

Another few wonderful side effects:

My son commented last night that it was the first time in a long time when he could reach in the glass cabinet and find a clean glass waiting. Usually it is empty or someone put dirty ones away without checking them. I take the blame for the latter. I would get so frustrated that everyone left all their nasty dishes in the sink for me to do alone that I did them haphazard. That, plus my health issues made standing there so long with hands in hot soapy water, bending and stretching, a total torment of pain. Now that everyone chips in and my standing there is limited, things are a lot more organized and cleaner. I know I have no excuses for my inner brat acting up, but I am happy to have a way to soothe her.

Another bonus I forgot to mention is that we use glass dishes instead of paper plates. Clean up is the same really and we like the feeling of using them. It is true that there is a totally different feel to using dishes over paper goods. Next step is cloth napkins when I tame the laundry dragon so I do not have to iron them.

Baby steps. baby steps. baby steps.

Warnings to all Cave People!

The yellow sticky notes have "mysteriously" appeared in my kitchen!

"Keep me organized! Love, your Pantry"

"Wipe down inside and out after each use!" (on the new microwave and the stove top)

"Store and refrigerate leftovers properly"

"After using dishes, rinse thoroughly and load in the dishwasher!"

When Flylady said make these type reminders and post them, I was not too keen on it as they just look "cluttery" to me. But then I live with the cave people, so maybe for a while I can leave them up to get them into good habits. Plus, I cannot argue with success. Yellow sticky notes are a small price to pay for a gleaming microwave, stovetop, and sink; a well ordered pantry and fridge; and clean dishes facing me in the morning instead of dirty ones.

So far the family has been very supportive and the cave people are becoming civilized. There is a different "feel" to the kitchen, and I find we are all more at peace in here. True story, Andrea: Your dad sat at the table last night and ate a Daniel meal (church is on the 7 day fast). Melanie asked him to,and since he was late and we had already eaten, we sat here and talked and laughed quietly. It was quite pleasant. Afterward, everone did the proper thing with the left overs and dishes. I did not have to do anything but swish and swipe the counters, run the dishwasher, and set out a fresh kitchen towel for today.

When Melanie and I were evacuated for Hurricane Katrina, we lived in an adorable cottage in the country in Hineston. We both felt such peace there. Even when Jonathan visited at Christmas, he commented on how peaceful it was. I am sure part of it was being away from the tremendous amount of spiritual warfare we have in New Orleans, but that is not the whole of it because the land I live on in New Orleans is Holy Ground, sanctified and covered in prayers and love. I am convinced that a huge part of it was the lack of clutter. We only had necessities with us. We also had our routines to keep things organized and clean.

My secret goal this week was could I change the cave man and achieve that feeling in my own home here and now. I did not have to nag or say a single word to any of the cave people. The peace carried over in the form of good habits. Now my kitchen is a warm, delightful place to be. I force myself to wear my hearing aids so we can all speak quietly and I can play jazz or classical music in the background.

Hearing aids are such a conundrum. After the years of silence, the amplification of every sound to a normal hearing world level is unsettling and hard to adjust to. Yet, I hate missing things that are said. I hate speaking loudly. Ah well, the adjustment is a small price to pay for peace in my home.

Maybe it is true: if Mama is happy, everyone is happy!

Joy! Joy! Joy!

Joy! Joy! Joy!

Every area of my kitchen, every nook and cranny, every cabinet is now organized and clutter free except the pantry! That's right! Even the "Tupperware cabinet" and "pots and pans" cabinet are both neat as a pin and organized. You can now open them without being attacked by various lids and bowls flying out at you, attacking your feet! Now when you open the cupboards your eyes are no longer assaulted by disorder and haphazard stacking!

That last bastion of disorder in the kitchen now taunts me to tackle it. I have set aside 2 hours this afternoon to put it into "apple pie order." My Nutrisystem food arrives later in the week so it is a good time for me to organize and declutter the pantry. Armed with a few dollars, I plan to venture out to Walmart or Dollar General this morning and purchase a few more organizers. Time to get that NS food out of cardboard boxes and into something a little more attractive and practical.

Bonus of Clutter Purging!

YAY! I discovered a great bonus to purging clutter yesterday! Especially now that our extended family does Buy Nothing Christmas!

There it was, in a nice little box, some 20 years old, just waiting to be found!!!

I so want to say what it is but I can't! I have to wait until Christmas some 11 months from now. The hard part is deciding who will get it between 2 people. Hrmmmm......

Oh well gives me time to clean and spruce it up a bit...maybe add some things to it.

FlyLady Resolution

This year I have resolved to begin to rid myself of clutter. (yes, I can hear Tiffany laughing in Alaska and Andrea in Alexandria!!) But, no, girls, I mean it! I did make a great start after Katrina. Ok so that was 3 years ago...and your point??

I am going to start with the Flylady system

http://www.flylady.net/

So right now my sink is shining! /beams proudly Day 1 accomplished!

My first problem will come with wearing lace up shoes since I no longer own any of those.